My Hero

Boy had it been a whirlwind three days. i have been trying to keep facebook as updated as I could, but I will do my best to fill in any blanks I may have left off! I know last month I posted about Sophia being my strength and seeing all the things she has gone through has been where I have pulled my strength from, well that wasn't and isn't the right word for her, Sophiamis my hero. What I have seen this little girl do in three days wild cause most adults to crumble. We'll start on Friday and I'll apologize now for a long blog minus pictures...I don't have a laptops with me and I haven't figured out how to upload pics to the blogger on my iPad. If someone else knows, please let me know! Anyway, even though we were supposed to be here at 6:45 on Friday, I was up at 4:39, pre surgery jitters and I couldn't sleep. Sophia was just a trooper though. She did great coming in and only got a little teary eyed when the doctor's came to take her back. Then came the longest five hours in my entire life. It was horrible. Every time the pager goes off, your heart stops for a second.you literally feel fifty pounds lighter when the surgeon comes out to talk to yo and tells you everything went as planned. The repair went really well, he isn't 100% sure this won't happen again, because the membrane that formed was actually scar tissue that formed, so we'll just have to wait and see. Going back to see her for the first time was both scary and relieving at the same time. She looked really good and her numbers looked amazing. It's funny, a lot of the same doctors and nurses that worked on Sophia almost five years ago not only are still here, but were her doctors and nurses this time! Sophia had a really good first night, we were able to get her extubated that evening. She was very scared, but she did great. Let me tell you something though, there is nothing harder in this entire world, then not only knowing your child is in excruciating pain, but witnessing it and having to swallow your sadness and fear to calm them down. I can't tell you the magic recipe or how I did it because I honestly don't know how I did it, I just did it. Sophia had a great first night and our only huge heartache was trying to figure out how to regulate her blood pressure. Saturday wewere able to get her to try drinking more liquids and we even got her to eat a little bit of toast. Her catheter was removed and that started the next challenge of learning how to get her in and out of bed without picking her up under her arms because of the sensitivity to her sternum. It took me a couple tries, but I eventually got it and we have had a solid potty routine ever since. You forget, when life seems normal, the things you cheer for as a heart mom. It's been two days since her catheter was removed and I am still cheering her in and calling when she pees! She is going to hate me when she poops! Coughing, we also had to push her really hard to cough, which was hard when you just had your chest open, to clear the fluid and gunk that was in there. She had a cute little heart pillow that I will post later that she would use every time she would cough or attempt to lay down or sit up. Sunday was a good day. We got her eating more, every though it was very painful for her and we got all of her IV lines not only turned off, but taken out. Now all that we and left was the chest tube, that was still draining a tiny bit, but the surgeon didn't want to take it out yet. We also found out that we had orders to go from the CICU or the floor. To was very exciting news, but Sophia had no idea what was in store for her. We were given the task to make her walk three times and sit twice Sunday. As difficult as it was to do, I pushed my little girl and she did it! Knowing that she would be able to get that ugly chest tube out the more she walked and was upright, the more I encouraged her. We tried to get more food in her too, but that darned chest tube just was bothering her and was a little too much for her, we did get her eating some though. Monday morning meant X-ray, echo and EKG time. It was another busy day, but a big one. We were able to get the nasty chest tube out and Sophia was able to get out and walk and went to the playroom twice! She is eating way better and I am finally getting my little girl back. Back to her being my hero. All if this above has been done in THREE DAYS!! My four year old had open heart surgery three days ago and was in the playroom today. She also has not been on a lot of pain medication. She has been offered, but she hasn't wanted them and we only push her to take them when we are removing things are she is crying in pain. While I type this, I can tell you she has only had pain meds once in the last 24 hours and that is only because we removed her chest tube. Her and I have fought and disagreed, but today she said it best. Sophia told me she loved me and I told her I love her too, even if she hated me for being mean to her and pushing her. In her sweet little 4 year old voice Sophia looked at me and said, "I don't hate you, I love you."